Post by CELESTE ADRIANNA MANNING on Dec 28, 2008 16:52:25 GMT -5
and now that i'm strong, i have figured out,
how this world turns cold and it breaks through my soul.
high school sucked in general. it never seemed enough to anyone that you tried your best but was never living up to your expectations your parents set for you. for celeste she didn't have any really. her aunt and grandmother merely told her to live her life the way she felt like it. though none wanted to talk place of her mother who pasted away long ago when celeste was a mere child. she only remembered bits and pieces of her mother but from the story she heard she sounded like a good woman. celeste was striving to be just as good as her more or even. her father seemed not to be helping much just because he was a drinker and spent most of his time locked in his room trying to numb the pain. but that's all that drinking seemed to do for anyone. was just numb the pain, not get rid of it.
celeste hadn't the fact of not being able to control herself around people and pretty much just act like a total slut. she never wanted to get wasted to the point where she would black out, she had a glass of wine once but nothing hard. her stomach couldn't hand beer at all, and she found that out the hard way when she was at a party with some of her best friends. most of her friends were guys but through the years it has seemed to balanced it's self out though she still does have some of her best friends who she will lean on for anything. she used to have one when she was younger but her and that girl back then seemed to have drifted apart into who knew what now. she of course seen her around school once or twice but didn't actually have any real time to talk to her anymore.
celeste had began to stay after school just out of habit of cheer leading practice. she had stopped cheer leading just because of the stupid bullshit that was going on now. she hated how people over reacted to the fact she was into girls and didn't have that same attraction to guys. she never had one, and just pretended to just to fit in. she was tired of attempting to fit in when clearly it wasn't really working out that well to begin with. she wasn't attracted to any of the cheerleaders just because they all seemed to have the same stupid attitude to wards life. celeste didn't usually have that attitude of at least hoped she didn't. she walked down the halls with her hands inside her hoped a biting at the bottom of her lip bored out of her mind. she hadn't found it in herself to tell her aunt she wasn't a cheerleader anymore. her whole family wanted her to be a cheerleader and follow her mom. but she didn't seem to have any of the same interest as her mother did.
the only real person that understood was her father. she was told not to see him, but couldn't help but seeing him just because he was her father after all. she knew she would never be able to live with him, but he was the only person that she told everything to. though it was hard trying to go over there or find a moment when he was in fact sober. she walked the halls for a couple more minuted before ending up in the music hall. she went into the auditorium peaking inside making sure it was in fact empty before sighing and walking into the big room with chairs that could fit at least a thousand or more at a time. it was were they always had their assembly's and it seated most of the student body.
she slowly walked towards the stage setting her bag on one of the rows before heading up the stairs to the stage. there was always a piano on the stage for some unknown reason. though she had a feeling the middle schoolers were performing every year like they did in the auditorium. her left hand was still in her pocket so she removed it and ran it over the top of the piano lightly. she didn't know how to play piano, but guitar was a different story. she sat on the bench in front of the piano and let her fingers tap the keys lightly. she laughed lightly at herself trying to play the piano before giving a lightly sigh and moving off the bench. she looked up at the lights that usually were much brighter than they were at the moment. she crooked her head to the side spotting a guitar case. she looked around before heading to it, and opening it and pulling out the guitar. she placed the strap over her shoulders before playing a few random notes. she closed her eyes, and began to play one of the songs she wrote by herself. most, well okay, none really knew that she could in fact play guitar and sing at the same time. "you know that i try to be, all that i can. but there's still a part of me i don't understand."
status ,, baked & ready
tag ,, sexy ry ; )
music ,, guardian angel ,, the red jumpsuit apparatus
word count ,, 892
celeste's song ,, my hero by hayden panitierre
notes ,, -pets- hayden ,, sorry it sucks.
